Losertown Calorie Calculator

Track your calories. Hit your goals. Simple.

Tool Icon Losertown Calorie Calculator

Losertown Calorie Calculator

Estimate daily calorie needs and weight change based on body stats

Standard Mifflin-St Jeor formula statistics
Calculation History:
No calculation history yet
Activity Level Guides:
Sedentary

Little to no exercise, desk job (BMR x 1.2)

Moderate

Exercise 3-5 days per week (BMR x 1.55)

Very Active

Heavy exercise 6-7 days per week (BMR x 1.725)

How to Use:
  1. Enter your Gender, Age, Weight, and Height in the basic statistics area
  2. Toggle 'Edit Activity & Goals' to set your lifestyle and caloric targets
  3. Click "Calculate Calories" to generate your daily energy requirements
  4. Review your maintenance vs goal calories and save the result for tracking

About This Tool

Alright, let’s keep it real. If you’re trying to drop a few pounds or just stop gaining, you’ve probably heard that calories matter. But counting them? Ugh. That’s where the Losertown Calorie Calculator comes in. It’s not fancy. No flashy animations, no “revolutionary” AI nonsense. Just a simple, no-bull tool that gives you a rough idea of how many calories you should be eating to lose weight—based on your actual life, not some textbook example.

I built this because I got tired of guessing. I’d eat “healthy” and still gain weight. Turns out, I was eating way more than I thought. This calculator uses your age, weight, height, gender, and activity level to estimate your daily calorie needs. Then it knocks off a reasonable amount so you can lose weight without feeling like you’re starving. It’s not magic. It’s math. And honestly? It works.

Key Features

  • Fast and simple—no sign-up, no spam, just plug in your stats and go.
  • Adjusts for your actual activity level. Sitting at a desk all day? It knows. Hiking every weekend? Also accounted for.
  • Gives you a safe calorie target for steady, sustainable weight loss—usually 1 to 2 pounds per week.
  • No diet jargon. No “clean eating” lectures. Just numbers that make sense.
  • Works on your phone, tablet, or that old laptop you refuse to throw out.
  • Free. Always. Because why charge people for basic math?

FAQ

Q: Is this accurate?
Look, it’s not a medical device. It’s a starting point. The numbers are based on established formulas (like Mifflin-St Jeor), but everyone’s body is different. Use it as a guide, not gospel. If you’re not losing after a couple weeks, tweak it. Add more movement. Eat a little less. Simple.

Q: Can I use this if I’m trying to gain muscle?
Technically, yes—but it’s built for weight loss. If you’re lifting heavy and want to bulk, you’ll need to eat more than the calculator suggests. This tool assumes you want to lose fat. For muscle gain, you’d add calories back in and focus on protein and training. Different goal, different plan.